My Thursday thoughts, in three parts

SPRING
It has been a week of the most amazing, gorgeous, sunshiny weather here and Brendan and I both agree that we feel like we're waking up from a season of fog. I don't know why this winter affected us more than other winters, but it was a tough one and we're glad it has passed. Yesterday I opened all of the windows to let in the fresh air (and some errant bugs) and delighted in the curtains billowing from the breeze. Welcome, spring!

HARRY
Harrison has enjoyed dining on the deck for lunch twice this week and he points at the windows and grunts enthusiastically to the outside. Sometimes he resorts to pounding on the doors...when we do take him out he says "wow" repeatedly and with awe at the trees, birds, airplanes, windchimes, and anything else he deems 'wow-worthy'. He is changing so quickly these days....Brendan looked at me with sad eyes earlier this week and said "They grow up too fast." Indeed, they do. Harrison has started to talk a little bit...he says: get you, all done, quack quack, cluck cluck, roar, arf arf (he's very good at animal sounds), and yesterday I heard a chorus of ma and daddy. So now I'm Ma. Ma is for teenaged girls who are rolling their eyes as they walk away, as in "Ma, you're so lame". It is the predecessor of M-oooooo-m or Mother, said with similar rolled eyes and perhaps a pouty lip, designed to annoy said parent until she either gives in to whatever the teen has requested, or sends the whiner to her room. Sometimes it is still 'Omma', which I like. Mom would be ok. Mommy would be ok for awhile. I'm just not sure about "Ma". Harry is also grasping the concept of opposites. If you say 'up down up down' he will squat and stand in line with yours words. He likes to practice 'open shut' with the cupboard doors while I'm attempting to cook dinner, and he enjoys 'in out' with his stacking cups in the bath. And I don't know how but he gets Brendan's jokes, even when neither one of us is laughing Harry lets loose a belly laugh and sometimes claps. Oh Boy(s).

THE END OF AN ERA
It seems the Sullivan Cape Cod House is under contract, and will no longer be 'ours' by May. We're really very sad about this...we remember great times at the Cape House:
...when we took our friend T there in the off season and explored the entire Cape without the drag of too many tourists and spent hours watching the sun change the shadows on the sand dunes...when we met Jim and Becky there for a weekend and played poker, then tried to highlight my hair with a kit from CVS that resulted in my looking like a cross between a skunk and a zebra, which took the better part of six months to correct...when almost all of the Sullivans met on the Fourth of July one year and Becky and I bobbed on the giant, gentle waves beyond the breaking surf for an entire afternoon of weightless bouyancy, thinking we could float that way forever if the sun and water stayed warm enough...when we played croquet in the backyard with Casey and Brian (they were small enough then to really enjoy our company, before the teen years tainted us as uncool in their eyes), the sound of their laughter and the chatter of our great big family filling the late afternoon...listening to Tim, Claire, Billy, and Marcia regale us with stories of growing up near Boston, laughing with each other as though they were teenagers and young adults again...my first visit to the Cape House when I was Brendan's girlfriend of just one year and I slept in one of the twin beds of the pink room and woke to find his cousin, Sara, soundly asleep in the other, feeling completely at ease and knowing that I wanted to be a part of his family forever...and most recently last June when we spent the two days before my Sullivan Baby Shower lying on the beach listening to the sounds of children playing amplified by the water, yet far away, and dreaming of our son in Korea as we held hands.
This weekend we're taking a spontaneous trip to the Cape House, where we'll look at the ecclectic assortmant of furniture and decor one last time, where we'll take a picture of our baby on the front steps, or maybe the back patio, so he won't be the only one of his cousins who never spent a holiday there. We'll visit Craigville Beach and go for a walk, and we might seek out the perfect cup of clam chowder at the Docksider or another favorite restaurant. We will sadly look around the house and pick out a momento or two to remind us of the fun we had there, once upon a time. We know that the house is just a place filled with replaceable things. What makes me sad is that the greater Sullivan Family (Tatros, Hosmers, Fanuccis, and more) is letting go of what was once a common meeting ground, a place to join together, one of the threads that kept us connected. I know that families grow and change, and sometimes depart...I just wish that some things could have stayed the same forever. I hate goodbyes...

At the end there are some pictures

You may have noticed that I haven't been blogging much lately (shame, shame) and you might be wondering what I've been up to that has eaten into my blogtime. I have been wondering the same thing. No really, what is it about time that it just disappears when you're not paying attention?

In all honesty, though, I have been busy with a few things:

1. I have started drawing again. For those of you who don't know I majored in art in college and then, much to my collective parents' chagrin, I stopped doing anything professionally art related after graduation. Why? Because it is harder than you might think to have a career in art, especially if one does not want to teach (which one doesn't in this case). After sending application after application to any and all art related businesses, museums, etc, etc., I found that I simply needed to get a job, and proceeded to work a series of unrelated, dead-end, boring jobs. Since Harrison's arrival I have been getting back to my formerly creative self in bits and chunks, and this week I got out the charcoal, the textured paper, and I just started to draw. I have a new "model" who is quite fidgety but really cute and says charming things to me while I sketch him, such as "bah" and "gigoo" ( get you). He also blows the occasional raspberry and works for Cheerios. When I feel more confident in my efforts I will post some of my latest drawings for your viewing pleasure.

2. Brendan and I have taken a look at our five year plan (could that sound more dorky?) and we think we want to try this adoption thing again. Because of the necessary costs associated with international adoption financial timing will be of key importance. We should be able to get the $10,000 tax credit in 2007, and that gets us halfway to another child...we do have loan options available, and some savings, but we don't want to put our finances at risk during a second adoption, and if at all possible we both agree that I should stay home with the kiddos, sans career (aside from being home manager and head chef). I have been brainstorming for ideas on how to earn some money while staying home. I have listed some items on ebay, namely sea glass jewelry that I've been making (I used to sell it in craft shops while living in New England). So far I have sold one piece...a slow start, but it costs me very little money/time to make them and I am still just figuring out the whole ebay process. Also, after getting rave reviews on the little fleece coat I made Harrison last fall, I am considering making baby clothes and selling them...but this is only in the idea phase of things right now. I am open to any and all ideas you might have for a somewhat creative gal like me to make some cash for family expansion!

3. Reading. I mentioned that I bought some new books, and I have had my eyes glued to the pages for the better part of a week now. I loaned out The Lovely Bones, but I finished The Time Traveler's Wife. It was a very interesting concept, a great love story, and it made me cry. I really, really liked it and would highly recommend it...although my MIL thought it wasn't rated "M" (for mom), so be careful who you recommend it to (some sex, foul language...would be rated R as a film). I also read In Her Shoes this week which I thought was great as well. It also made me cry (I do love a weepy read!) and felt I could really relate to being the older, chubby sister who has an effortlessly gorgeous little sister. I must take a book break, though, as Brendan hates it when I do nothing but read. (Although I must admit that the pages of the curious incident of the dog in the night time are beckoning me...)

And now, because you have been patient in reading my very long post, I will reward you with more pictures of our star and his new shoes:

Living the good life.

Happy St. Patrick's Day to all of my corned beef and cabbage eating friends out there...don't drink too many green beers tonight.

One of my dogs is desparately trying to eat a chick pea off of the high chair. Should dogs eat chick peas? (And, you might ask, why is H eating chick peas for breakfast?)

I turned 29 the other day. Still feel like the baby of our crowd even though some of our crowd have babies.

You cannot make English muffins out of Jiffy Mix. You can make fried biscuits, which aren't half bad with jam. But don't burn them because your house will smell like overcooked Jiffy...ick.

If you live near Saratoga you must dine at Ravenous...it is divine. Last evening I had the Taj Mahal, a savory crepe with chicken, apple, and cauliflauer curry, an organic mixed greens salad, a mug of mint tea, and pommes frittes. YUM. I have never had the delight of trying a sweet dessert crepe, as I always over-indulge on dinner but one day I will go for the sole purpose of enjoying dessert. Want to join me?

Harrison has new shoes....um, three pairs of new shoes to be exact. Aunt Brooke bought one pair, red and white sneakers that he loves to stare down at as he stomps around the living room. I bought him a pair of short wellies for muddy spring days, which I feel are surely right around the corner. I also could not help buying a super cute pair of navy, turquoise, and lime green sneakers. Oh, the joy of dressing a boy!

I purchased three new books yesterday: The Lovely Bones, curious incident of the dog in the night-time, and The Time Traveler's Wife. This is very indulgent of me but rereading my current collection was starting to be a bore. Must go to library next time! Do you have suggestions for more good reads?

Three weeks until our vacation at: http://www.sixflagsgreatescapelodge.com/

Did you know that almost every morning for 6 1/2 years my Brendan has left me a cup of tea on the counter, fixed just the way I like it with too much sugar and just a little milk, so that when I awake it is ready for me? That is love. How could I not adore this man?

Life is good, indeed.

Harrison's Studio Pics

Here are the studio photos we had done of Harrison a week ago:





















Yesterday my friend E and I went to the mall to walk (we really wanted to take a walk outside but it was raining) with Harry, and while we were there I took him on his first carousel ride. He liked it for about the first two minutes after which he wiggled and squirmed and was generally not pleased with the motion of it all. Neither was I...my stomach churned with each new turn around the food court and I started thinking that I am getting too old for rides at the ripe old age of 29 minus two days. I could not wait for the darned thing to stop swirling, but it seems to have no time limit, rather it stops when someone else comes along who wants to ride. So it was excruciatingly long (or so it seemed in the moment) and I will definitely not do that again any time soon.

Toes, Afternoon Light, and Mohawk: a photo shoot

The photo shoot went ok, except the photographer made Harrison cry. He has a thing about very high pitched voices especially when the voices are excited...they make him very uncomfortable and he usually cries. The poor photographer we had that afternoon had a very high pitched voice, and she raised it a few notches even higher to try to make Harry smile, which directly caused him to dissolve into pouty, chin quivering tears. So the very first shot is an almost smile, pre-tears, and he's wearing a regular outfit. In his hanbok photo he is trying to be brave and smiley, but it just didn't work. Of course after the shoot was over and our photographer stopped screetching at him he was fine - in fact quite delighted with his new friend. I have not scanned the pitures yet so I can't post them today, but in my next post I will include them. We're going to try to take a nice, smiling hanbok picture here this week to send to his foster mother in Korea. I don't want to send the one we have as it looks a little like someone is pinching Harry. The problem with going to a studio to have pictures taken is I always like the ones we take at home much better...they just seem to be more realistic and more like Harry. Have you ever seen such adorable toes?

March Madness

Happy March, and welcome to the month of winter that I hate the most. It is long, there are no holidays (aside from St. Patrick's Day and really, what new parent has time for a fun jaunt to the local pub for green beer?), and Mother Nature seems to feel the need to give us snow and cold now when the rest of winter has been barren and brown. I don't want snow and cold now, I want warm sunny days and little green sprouts sticking their brave heads above the soil! Bah! Ok, so there is my birthday around the middle of the month, and that thought does console me a little. And the first official day of spring does reside in March. But the snow and cold have got to go. Do you hear me, Mother Nature?

In other news Harrison discovered dancing this week! He was in the living room playing when he suddenly turned around and started lifting his feet alternately and stomping them on the floor, all while clapping his hands and swaying a little. He can dance! Oh, it is so cute and he is absolutely thrilled with himself when he does it. He grins from ear to ear and laughs, especially if we join in. The peculiar thing is he doesn't seem to dance when there is music on, rather just when the moment feels right. I envy his sense of abandon and his ability to live in the moment.
Silly thought of the day: wouldn't it be wonderful if adults did the same? If we just started dancing freely when we were happy, without a care in the world as to how we looked or what people would think? Instead of blank, staring faces walking down the sidewalk there could be tapping feet and waving arms, movement to lighten our days. We might even stop being the overweight society that we are. What happened to self expression of this form? Sure, it might look funny but in a way I think it would be beautiful. I haven't uploaded new pictures of Harrison yet, but we are going to have his one year studio pictures done this weekend, one in his hanbok and one in regular garb. Let's all hope he will sit still on the platform for the required two minutes it takes to get a good shot, and doesn't decide that it would be fun to pull down the background scenery, jump off the platform, or scream. Not that our darling would do that. No. Never. (Hah!)