We are at the beginning of the weekend that marks my favorite holiday, Independence Day, better known in my household as the Fourth of July. There are many reasons to love the Fourth, and here are mine:
1. I don't have to buy anyone a present. Easier on my budget means I can enjoy the day with less stress.
2. I don't have to send a card. I am not a big fan of the so-called "Hallmark Holidays" which guilt us into spending several dollars per card per person for seemingly any and every holiday...St. Patrick's Day, Halloween, Easter, Christmas, etc. Before Harrison I made my own cards in a small protest, but now I haven't got as much free time.
3. There are no mandatory or obligatory family gatherings to attend, which means our time is our own. Brendan and I both have large families, and we both love our families, which means that most of our holidays are actually spent traveling between the homes of our loved ones. We never get to spend more than an hour or two at each stop and it can become a frustrating marathon, especially now that we have Harrison and all of his gear to lug around, too. On the Fourth we can do whatever we want, whether that means going to the lake for the day, staying home, or just watching a movie, there is no pressure and no timeline. Ahhhhhh.
4. BBQ. Need I say more? Chicken slathered in yummy BBQ sauce, pasta salad with black olives and fresh herbs, potato salad (although mine is never as good as my Dad's), chips and dip, watermelon, strawberry shortcake, homemade lemonade, baked beans, etc. How could I not love a holiday with such a feast attached to it? In my book it beats out Thanksgiving, easily.
5. Fireworks are cool...I love the very idea of shooting flaming rockets into the sky for the sole purpose of watching them explode into myriad colors and shapes. However, my dogs would rather not witness this part of the celebration as it makes them slightly, er, very uncomfortable.
6. Four days of fun! Because the Fourth falls on a Tuesday this year the festivities will encompass the weekend, Monday, and Tuesday...At least they will for us. Unlike the one-day-only pressure of Thanksgiving, Christmas, Mothers and Fathers Days, and Easter, we have four days over which to spread the fun. Yipppeeeeee!
7. I don't have to give out candy or create a super fabulous costume for my (somewhat unwilling) son to wear from house to house. And I don't have to schlep from house to house with said son.
8. The weather has a good chance of being nice, simply because it is July. We're pretty certain it won't snow or sleet, and even if it rains we can have fun indoors without the need for bulky sweaters and wool socks. That, in itself, is good reason to celebrate!
9. There are good sales on anything and everything, which can help us kick start a better-than ever summer! And I do love to shop for deals...
10. It is the birthdate of our country. Although the good 'ole USA has its problems (don't get me started) it was founded on the premise of freedom and liberty for all, and it is the beloved home of my birth. The Fourth reminds me not to take for granted my position in the world. I was lucky to be born here, and I am grateful for all of the opportunities I have been provided just for being a citizen of the United States. To grow up knowing that I could be and do anything I put my mind to is huge, and most women of the world do not have that priviledge. The Fourth reminds me not to be complacent, and it reminds me that we still have a long way to go before our country is all that it can be.
In keeping with the spirit of Independence Day, Harrison decided to free himself of the bars that have been holding him back, namely: his crib. He climbed out this morning and fell on his head (he's fine, although mom was slightly a wreck), and has since refused to stay put in it. I turned it around so the very tall side faces out, but he still tries to scale the rungs. I think he might be related to Spider Man. What do we do now?
Friday, June 30, 2006
Wednesday, June 28, 2006
Rescheduled
Wednesday, July 19. 8:45 a.m. Confirmed all around. It better not change again, or heads will roll.
A steady stream of expletives...
has been running through my head since I got off the phone with the paralegal at our attorney's office this morning. They need to reschedule the finalization because our attorney had a conflict. I am on the verge of tears due to anger and frustration. So let me lay it all out for you:
Harrison came home on July 26, 2005.
We met with our attorney for the first time on August 17, 2005, in order to get a head start on the paperwork, per instructions from our adoption agency.
We completed all paperwork assigned to us by the attorney, went to our doctors for physicals, and waited the mandatory six months before finalization would be possible. We stayed in touch with our adoption agency and completed all of their requirements for finalization in a timely manner.
When the six month waiting period was complete, our social worker completed her paperwork and sent her consent for finalization to our adoption agency. Our adoption agency sent a copy of that consent to our attorney by the end of February, which should have set the ball rolling to get us to finalization.
And then began the botchedness. The paralegal called in early March (or was it February) and asked us if we would want to finalize at the same time as another family we know whose daughter came home at around the same time. If so, she would "withhold" our paperwork and send it in at the same time as theirs so we might share a finalization court date. Sounded fun, but it was strictly against our agency's policy to delay finalization for any reason, so we declined. The warning bells should have been loud and clear in my head at that point, but in good faith I silenced them.
We didn't hear anything for a few weeks so I called the attorney to check the status of our file, and the paralegal, sounding very frustrated that I had called, told me that their legal secretary had quit, and they were in the process of hiring so all work was on hold. What? Why were we not informed of this? Again I silenced the warning bells, explaining to myself that it was not their fault someone had quit.
Along came the middle of April, and still no word. I called again, and this time our 'trusty' paralegal told me it was time to come in and sign the final paperwork, the petition to adopt. We made an appointment, signed the papers, and were told we were just waiting for a court date.
At the end of April, the paralegal called us and said "oops!" she had forgotten to have us renew our child abuse clearances for New York State, and she'd need to send that to the court. The form would come from our adoption agency. We should fill it out as quickly as possible and then send it back to our adoption agency. They, in turn, would send it on to the state and when the clearances came in they'd send it to our attorney. We followed those directions, and the clearances were back to our attorney within a week or two. Although we were miffed that this very important step had been forgotten by our lawyer, we decided we were too close to finalizing to make a big deal out of it. Again, the warning bells.
At the ned of May we'd heard nothing about a date, so I called again. The paralegal refused to call the court at that time, fearing she would "irritate" the court secretary and further delay our finalization. This time the bells in my head had my full attention. Why was she so afraid of ticking off the court? Do they have a bad relatioship with that court? Is our attorney's reputation getting in the way of our becoming a legal family? I hesitantly agreed to wait until the end of June for them to call the court and check the status of our file.
On June 16th we received a bill from our lawyer, and this put us at the exact dollar amount of the quote they gave us for finalizing. This means that anything else they charge us for will be above what we have budgeted for. Not that we can't pay for it, but I really, really have no use for their "drag it out as long as possible and bill for every minute" policy. I am beyond irritated.
So, it's the end of June. Last Friday I got a call from our adoption agency wondering why in the world it is taking so long for us to finalize, since the gave their consent back in February. I explained as best I could, and then they requested another report about Harrison's progress and warned that if we do not finalize soon we will need to pay for extra post placement visits (at $250.00 each). Shit. I called the useless paralegal again, and she said that she was typing a letter to the court as we spoke requesting a check on the status of our file. The letter would go out on Friday, and she hoped we'd have it scheduled soon. I explained to her, yet again, the urgency of the matter, the pressure we're getting from our agency, and our disappointment that this has not been a speedier transaction.
Tuesday, yesterday, I got that call that made my heart sing. And the paralegal, to her credit, did say that the date was not set in stone. But she also said she did not see any reason why it could not be that date and time, so we should write it on our calendars. Brendan asked for the day off. We started planning a party. And today, Wednesday, useless paralegal calls again, and says there is a scheduling conflict after all. She tries to make it sound like the court should have known our attorney could not schedule anything for that day, but really it is not their job to know the schedules of attorneys. It is the paralegal's job. Then she has the gall to be sarcastically annoyed with me, saying "It's only going to be scheduled a few weeks out, it's not like it's going to be two or three months". Well gee, now I feel better. Stupid useless paralegal.
Yep, a steady stream of expletives. You might not want to talk to me today, as I might just bite your head off in misdirected anger.
Harrison came home on July 26, 2005.
We met with our attorney for the first time on August 17, 2005, in order to get a head start on the paperwork, per instructions from our adoption agency.
We completed all paperwork assigned to us by the attorney, went to our doctors for physicals, and waited the mandatory six months before finalization would be possible. We stayed in touch with our adoption agency and completed all of their requirements for finalization in a timely manner.
When the six month waiting period was complete, our social worker completed her paperwork and sent her consent for finalization to our adoption agency. Our adoption agency sent a copy of that consent to our attorney by the end of February, which should have set the ball rolling to get us to finalization.
And then began the botchedness. The paralegal called in early March (or was it February) and asked us if we would want to finalize at the same time as another family we know whose daughter came home at around the same time. If so, she would "withhold" our paperwork and send it in at the same time as theirs so we might share a finalization court date. Sounded fun, but it was strictly against our agency's policy to delay finalization for any reason, so we declined. The warning bells should have been loud and clear in my head at that point, but in good faith I silenced them.
We didn't hear anything for a few weeks so I called the attorney to check the status of our file, and the paralegal, sounding very frustrated that I had called, told me that their legal secretary had quit, and they were in the process of hiring so all work was on hold. What? Why were we not informed of this? Again I silenced the warning bells, explaining to myself that it was not their fault someone had quit.
Along came the middle of April, and still no word. I called again, and this time our 'trusty' paralegal told me it was time to come in and sign the final paperwork, the petition to adopt. We made an appointment, signed the papers, and were told we were just waiting for a court date.
At the end of April, the paralegal called us and said "oops!" she had forgotten to have us renew our child abuse clearances for New York State, and she'd need to send that to the court. The form would come from our adoption agency. We should fill it out as quickly as possible and then send it back to our adoption agency. They, in turn, would send it on to the state and when the clearances came in they'd send it to our attorney. We followed those directions, and the clearances were back to our attorney within a week or two. Although we were miffed that this very important step had been forgotten by our lawyer, we decided we were too close to finalizing to make a big deal out of it. Again, the warning bells.
At the ned of May we'd heard nothing about a date, so I called again. The paralegal refused to call the court at that time, fearing she would "irritate" the court secretary and further delay our finalization. This time the bells in my head had my full attention. Why was she so afraid of ticking off the court? Do they have a bad relatioship with that court? Is our attorney's reputation getting in the way of our becoming a legal family? I hesitantly agreed to wait until the end of June for them to call the court and check the status of our file.
On June 16th we received a bill from our lawyer, and this put us at the exact dollar amount of the quote they gave us for finalizing. This means that anything else they charge us for will be above what we have budgeted for. Not that we can't pay for it, but I really, really have no use for their "drag it out as long as possible and bill for every minute" policy. I am beyond irritated.
So, it's the end of June. Last Friday I got a call from our adoption agency wondering why in the world it is taking so long for us to finalize, since the gave their consent back in February. I explained as best I could, and then they requested another report about Harrison's progress and warned that if we do not finalize soon we will need to pay for extra post placement visits (at $250.00 each). Shit. I called the useless paralegal again, and she said that she was typing a letter to the court as we spoke requesting a check on the status of our file. The letter would go out on Friday, and she hoped we'd have it scheduled soon. I explained to her, yet again, the urgency of the matter, the pressure we're getting from our agency, and our disappointment that this has not been a speedier transaction.
Tuesday, yesterday, I got that call that made my heart sing. And the paralegal, to her credit, did say that the date was not set in stone. But she also said she did not see any reason why it could not be that date and time, so we should write it on our calendars. Brendan asked for the day off. We started planning a party. And today, Wednesday, useless paralegal calls again, and says there is a scheduling conflict after all. She tries to make it sound like the court should have known our attorney could not schedule anything for that day, but really it is not their job to know the schedules of attorneys. It is the paralegal's job. Then she has the gall to be sarcastically annoyed with me, saying "It's only going to be scheduled a few weeks out, it's not like it's going to be two or three months". Well gee, now I feel better. Stupid useless paralegal.
Yep, a steady stream of expletives. You might not want to talk to me today, as I might just bite your head off in misdirected anger.
Tuesday, June 27, 2006
Phew!
I woke up this morning and breathed a huge sigh of relief...There is nothing on our calendars for the rest of the summer, and that feels extremely, hugely good. We've been running from activity to task to event all spring, and when I saw that clean calendar I felt the tension in my shoulders ease. Summer is here, and now I can rest.
Then this morning I got another of those pivotal calls that come with adopting from Korea...the call announcing the date of our finalization in court!!! On July 14 Harrison will become our son legally and forever! I cannot tell you how good it will feel to have the adoption decree in hand, signed by a jugde, and to know that we are a legal family. There are no words to describe the happiness I will feel that day.
Pictures above are from last week, when Harry and Daddy were walking about the yard.
Friday, June 9, 2006
Motivation: Zero
Projects in limbo:
-basement...finish paint, put up trim, install doors, etc.
-vegetable garden
-guest bedroom
-garage sale preparation
-mudroom overhaul
-bookshelves for loft
-slipcover living room pillows
-landscape road frontage
-grass for the backyard this decade???
Motivation: Zero
I think the rain is making us sluggish and pathetic. It is 8:19 a.m. I already had a cup of tea and a cup of coffee, and I feel I could use about ten more cups to get myself moving. I know the rain is a wonderful thing, especially after the particularly dry (no snow) winter we had, but c'mon...would one day of bright sunshine hurt?
The Greater Sullivan Family (aunts, uncles, siblings, nieces & nephews, oh my!) is descending upon our area this weekend, and we will be quite busy, I expect. Add to list above: clean house. Ok, I've got to get out of this chair and start my day. Poo.
-basement...finish paint, put up trim, install doors, etc.
-vegetable garden
-guest bedroom
-garage sale preparation
-mudroom overhaul
-bookshelves for loft
-slipcover living room pillows
-landscape road frontage
-grass for the backyard this decade???
Motivation: Zero
I think the rain is making us sluggish and pathetic. It is 8:19 a.m. I already had a cup of tea and a cup of coffee, and I feel I could use about ten more cups to get myself moving. I know the rain is a wonderful thing, especially after the particularly dry (no snow) winter we had, but c'mon...would one day of bright sunshine hurt?
The Greater Sullivan Family (aunts, uncles, siblings, nieces & nephews, oh my!) is descending upon our area this weekend, and we will be quite busy, I expect. Add to list above: clean house. Ok, I've got to get out of this chair and start my day. Poo.
Thursday, June 8, 2006
Impatiently waiting, and Camera blues
I am getting really antsy. We still have heard nothing from our attorney on the date of Harrison's adoption finalization. I called last week and spoke to the paralegal, who assured me the courts have everything they need, we're just waiting for a court date. If there is anything I hate hate hate about the adoption process it is all of the waiting. Particularly this wait, as our agency sent everything necessary to our attorney months ago. We will not be using this attorney again, ever.
I really just want to know forever and for sure that Harrison is ours. I know in my heart that he is, but waiting for a damned piece of paper to make it all legal is making me a little edgy! The worst part is our parelegal had called back in February or March and said we should be finalizing "soon". In my book, "soon" is not defined by 3-4 months. Their office seems to be all talk and no action. Ugh!
***************************
Changing topics completely, you've probably noticed the severe lack of photos on my posts. I mentioned before that I broke the digital camera at the playground (zoom button fell off). What I failed to realize at that time was I also shorted out the rechargable lithium battery by putting it in my pocket with my keys. If you use a rechargable lithium battery, do not do this! It kills the battery for good! I went to our local Big Box Store that sells all things gadgety and bought what I thought was the compatable battery for our charger. I got it home, removed it from it's wrappings, and tried to fit it into the charger. No deal. The darned thing doesn't fit because Kodak, being the super annoying geniuses that they are, realized that we consumers would of course buy a battery/charger combo for 25-30 dollars. Then, when said battery dies, we would need to replace it, only to find that you cannot buy a replacement battery for said charger at local Big Box Store. You must instead buy it directly through Kodak online, and pay shipping fees. When all is said and done, buying the battery and paying shipping fees costs almost, but not quite, as much as paying for a new battery/charger combo. Thus, Kodak = The Evil Empire. I don't know if I should pay for another combo and have the convenience of using my camera NOW, or if I should try to save three dollars and order online the elusive battery, which would result in weeks of waiting. Or if we should just cut our losses and buy a different camera altogether because, really, this is getting out of hand for a broken camera!
And for those of you wondering, yes, I can buy regular batteries for the camera, but it eats them at a rate of (no joking) two per 1/2 day. And it sucks the battery juice whether it is on or off. This is not only a major pain in the bum, it is also expensive. So that is why you've not seen pictures if Harrison. That, and I have resorted to regular film and old fashioned f- stop and shutter speed photography, which feels scary and good all at the same time. It will be like getting an unexpeced surprise when we have the film developed!
I really just want to know forever and for sure that Harrison is ours. I know in my heart that he is, but waiting for a damned piece of paper to make it all legal is making me a little edgy! The worst part is our parelegal had called back in February or March and said we should be finalizing "soon". In my book, "soon" is not defined by 3-4 months. Their office seems to be all talk and no action. Ugh!
***************************
Changing topics completely, you've probably noticed the severe lack of photos on my posts. I mentioned before that I broke the digital camera at the playground (zoom button fell off). What I failed to realize at that time was I also shorted out the rechargable lithium battery by putting it in my pocket with my keys. If you use a rechargable lithium battery, do not do this! It kills the battery for good! I went to our local Big Box Store that sells all things gadgety and bought what I thought was the compatable battery for our charger. I got it home, removed it from it's wrappings, and tried to fit it into the charger. No deal. The darned thing doesn't fit because Kodak, being the super annoying geniuses that they are, realized that we consumers would of course buy a battery/charger combo for 25-30 dollars. Then, when said battery dies, we would need to replace it, only to find that you cannot buy a replacement battery for said charger at local Big Box Store. You must instead buy it directly through Kodak online, and pay shipping fees. When all is said and done, buying the battery and paying shipping fees costs almost, but not quite, as much as paying for a new battery/charger combo. Thus, Kodak = The Evil Empire. I don't know if I should pay for another combo and have the convenience of using my camera NOW, or if I should try to save three dollars and order online the elusive battery, which would result in weeks of waiting. Or if we should just cut our losses and buy a different camera altogether because, really, this is getting out of hand for a broken camera!
And for those of you wondering, yes, I can buy regular batteries for the camera, but it eats them at a rate of (no joking) two per 1/2 day. And it sucks the battery juice whether it is on or off. This is not only a major pain in the bum, it is also expensive. So that is why you've not seen pictures if Harrison. That, and I have resorted to regular film and old fashioned f- stop and shutter speed photography, which feels scary and good all at the same time. It will be like getting an unexpeced surprise when we have the film developed!
Sunday, June 4, 2006
Things that make you go OOF
There are moments in the life of every parent that make you scratch your head and say "Huh, they never mentioned that in the baby/toddler books". These are some of our latest head scratching moments:
When we asked Harrison to dance last week he began with his usual foot stomping, arm flailing gig, but then switched things up a bit by adding spins! Yes, the boy does his own version of the pirouette, complete with spotting (whipping his head around so as not to fall over from the dizziness). Now all of his dances include spins, and he is so very pleased with himself for this new capability that when he stops, he actually claps for himself. Imagine, spins!
I was cooking dinner two nights ago and Brendan was watching Harry. We looked away for no more than a moment, and in that moment Harry scaled one of our dining room chairs and climbed onto our dinner table. He was starting to stand up and walk around when we both looked up and spotted Spider Baby. Gah! I have no surfaces left upon which to store my clutter!
Harry's vocabulary increases daily, it seems, but he in addition to new words ("Ickick" for Isaac, "Gahmom" for Grandma, and "MmmMmm" when something is tasty) he has also learned a few new sound effects. His new favorite sound effect is "OOF". OOF if it is hard to get onto the couch, OOF if he stumbles and falls, OOF if he strains to reach something he is not supposed to have, and OOF if his toy car runs into the wall. Now the funny thing is, neither Brendan nor I tend to say OOF. I don't think I have ever said it, in fact. Does this mean he made it up?
And lastly, Harrison cracks himself up and he thinks his buddy Isaac is quite a comedian, too. When he thinks something is especially amusing he actually throws his head back and lets loose the loudest belly laugh I've ever heard from a toddler. It makes me laugh, and when he sees me laughing he throws his head back and laughs some more. This kid surely has a great sense of humor!
Oh! And he says "vroom vroom" when pushing his toy car around. How cute is that?
When we asked Harrison to dance last week he began with his usual foot stomping, arm flailing gig, but then switched things up a bit by adding spins! Yes, the boy does his own version of the pirouette, complete with spotting (whipping his head around so as not to fall over from the dizziness). Now all of his dances include spins, and he is so very pleased with himself for this new capability that when he stops, he actually claps for himself. Imagine, spins!
I was cooking dinner two nights ago and Brendan was watching Harry. We looked away for no more than a moment, and in that moment Harry scaled one of our dining room chairs and climbed onto our dinner table. He was starting to stand up and walk around when we both looked up and spotted Spider Baby. Gah! I have no surfaces left upon which to store my clutter!
Harry's vocabulary increases daily, it seems, but he in addition to new words ("Ickick" for Isaac, "Gahmom" for Grandma, and "MmmMmm" when something is tasty) he has also learned a few new sound effects. His new favorite sound effect is "OOF". OOF if it is hard to get onto the couch, OOF if he stumbles and falls, OOF if he strains to reach something he is not supposed to have, and OOF if his toy car runs into the wall. Now the funny thing is, neither Brendan nor I tend to say OOF. I don't think I have ever said it, in fact. Does this mean he made it up?
And lastly, Harrison cracks himself up and he thinks his buddy Isaac is quite a comedian, too. When he thinks something is especially amusing he actually throws his head back and lets loose the loudest belly laugh I've ever heard from a toddler. It makes me laugh, and when he sees me laughing he throws his head back and laughs some more. This kid surely has a great sense of humor!
Oh! And he says "vroom vroom" when pushing his toy car around. How cute is that?
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)